Today marks the anniversary of my wedding. As of today my lovely wife and I have been married two years now, and known each other for almost three. Between the baby, work, and our own romance I don’t know where the time went. I’m looking forward to many more anniversary’s spent with her. And as I keep telling her, I am going to grow old with her. So, here is a poem in honor of the occasion. I hope you all have a good night and you find that special someone, your other half, to join you in this life.
I have climbed as far as I can go, my flesh bruised and weary.
I stand now at the edge, looking out at the desolate land below.
Rising above me is a glorious kingdom, a verdant paradise.
It lies just beyond my reach, a risky leap away.
I can give it all and jump, or I can try to descend below.
Desolation or paradise, the leap or the fall.
by Nicholas Byrley
I feel like I’m always apologizing lately for not posting, seems a bad habit to make. Between work, daycare issues, rides, and more I’ve been pretty much passing out everyday. So today I have good news, we got another car yesterday after a full day of searching. We also got our daughter into a good daycare that lacks the issues of the previous one. I feel very blessed and thankful today, the Lord has delivered us. Looking forward to having more time to spend not rushing and to write. The poem today is about what we all go through at some time or another. Choosing to commit yourself to God in heaven or fight it out in the world below. Hope you all enjoyed it, feel free to comment.
Stress is one of those things everyone has to deal with. A constant nagging feeling that leaves you unable to rest or enjoy life. Or maybe it makes you irritable and prone to lashing out. Its effects are numerous, from your mood to your health and your relationships. Everyone has different ways of dealing with it. Myself, I try to just let it all go. If that fails, I play video games or read to take my mind off things. I also pray, which really should be my first choice but in the moment I often lose sight of it. My wife on the other hand deals with stress by praying of course, but also by just going out and getting away from it all, or by shopping. I think the different ways we all deal with stress is part of what makes up a person.
There are pitfalls to dealing with stress though. One might commit to heavy drinking, or nights of wild abandon. Neither of which will really reduce stress, and have problems of their own to deal with after the fact. There is also the urge to label someone as the cause of your problems(as if anyone can make you feel something you don’t choose). That person then becomes the focus of your aggression rather than dealing with your own choices. I have been reading the book Boundaries by Henry Cloud and doing a sort of workshop/class sponsored by my job. The book really hammers home how a lot of issues are self-made and that we don’t stumble into our problems.
The books focus is of course on how to build and maintain proper boundaries, and the effects of not doing so. But I feel it deals a lot with causes of stress in our lives as well. From giving in to others and feeling guilty about things to not really defining our relationships with family and others. I highly recommend it. I’m writing about this today because I know we all deal with stress and worry. Finding and keeping a daycare for our daughter has been an extremely stressful experience for my wife and I. As of right now, we still don’t even have a definite caretaker for her. But, we persist and we do so without letting stress dictate our lives. We don’t always succeed in fighting off the beast known as stress, but we are more aware of the weapons to deal with it now than we were in the past.
So we have begun feeding our daughter “real” food now finally and I had to write a poem about it. Shes just the cutest most amazing thing sitting there, trying to figure out whats going on. We’ve fed her several vegetables and fruits now, her reaction a little different with each one. I used to not really be big on “firsts”, but I must confess that with my daughter that is changing. I looked forward to her first taste of real food. And I know I’m looking forward to other things like her first step and word. Each will be a little different, but very touching to me. And then come eighteen years from now when shes all grown I’ll be able to look back over the whole wondrous thing. Every first she gets I want to be there for, so I can remember it later. I know life intrudes at times and you can’t help but miss some of these, but I will really pray I don’t miss that many. I want to capture every moment that is filled with the magic and love that is raising a child. Its much too precious to let it slip away…
So I find myself slipping deeper and deeper into geekdom, and not caring how far it goes. I have been seduced by the lure graphic novels, the over-the-top and larger-than-life world of comic books. All the superhero movies have got me wanting to play superhero games, and then the same urge to read about them. There is not a lot out there book wise for superheros, its kind of a niche genre. But there are of course, millions of comic books. So I signed away the remaining non-geeky parts of me and dove in.
First up; Thanos. I saw the big purple lout at the end of the Avengers movie and wanted to know more. The man behind the curtain controlling the Chitari(sp?) and Loki. I wanted to see what he was all about and how he stacked up against the heroes. Turns out, hes just plain awesome. Like, if awesome were an element, he’d be made of it. I’m not going to sing of his exploits, since I don’t want to spoil anything. But really, its like if Sherlock Holmes’ nemesis the great Moriarty was a super powered villain with galactic-scale ambition.
Thanos plays with foe and friend alike, and accompanies it with his grin featured above. I would learn to fear him.
In the meanwhile I have been filling my Kindle with comic books, trying to catch up on the last decade of comics(Marvel and DC alike). Favorites so far(beyond Thanos) have been Marvel’s Illuminati and Red Hood and Suicide Squad in DC’s New 52. Very good reads. I keep trying new comics(to me) to see if I like them, so I’ll gladly take any recommendations. Tell me what you all like and I’ll check it out.
I have an odd relationship with food, in that I don’t really care about it. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy certain foods. But I eat just so that I don’t starve for the most part. Before I got married I used to have to double check sometimes to make sure I had eaten. It was easy for me to get caught up in whatever I was doing and forget to eat. I also had an issue with cooking in that the time involved never seemed to be worth it. To cook a good meal I would have to at least put in twenty minutes, add to that the time spent eating and I was wasting a half hour easy.
My feelings on cooking changed after I met my wife. She doesn’t forget to eat and enjoys a well cooked meal. I was hardly a top notch chef but I’ve been doing my best to rise to the challenge ever since. I’ve also found I enjoy cooking for her, the process of turning the assorted ingredients into a full meal a soothing one. I still struggle with the time investment, especially after a long day of work. But I’m always happy to have made a pleasing meal. Now with the arrival of our daughter there is a new potential food critic in the house.
Once she starts sampling grown up food there will be a new set of tastes to cater too. I look forward to finding her likes and dislikes and creating those fond childhood memories of treasured foods and snacks. I still remember the way my dad makes grilled cheese, the perfect golden brown crust and the gooey cheese. Its something I still strive to emulate today in my own grilled cheese. There are many things I can’t do well, but for whatever reason cooking is something I’ve been given some ability in. Even if its just enough so that I can show my love to my wife.
In blog news, this marks the start of my second week of posting. I logged 3369 total words and nine posts for the previous week. If I continue at that rate I’ll have over 175 thousand words written in a year. About the size of a long novel or two shorter novels. Thanks for all the likes and the follows, I’ll try to keep things interesting for this week too.
This is my fifth go at writing something up tonight, I’ve reviewed and trashed several topics ranging from volunteering to imaginative gaming. None really felt to me like they passed muster, or really conveyed anything useful. So instead I’ve decided to actually share a little about myself. Who am I, about my family, and my life.I state in my about profile that I am a twenty-eight year old happily married guy with a new daughter just looking for an outlet for his words. This is true, my wife’s name is Hilary and we’ve been married since March 25, 2011. That darling little baby up there drawing in page views for me is my daughter Eden. I love both of them with all my heart and I’m doing my best to grow old with my beautiful wife.
Beyond that most important part of me are a myriad of other things, the little facets of myself. I am an avid gamer, on both PC and console. Any type of game really, though usually strategy and RPG. I am a cat lover, unapologetically and have been since I was a child. My wife likes to call me the ‘cat whisperer’ because I can call any of the strays we come across to me and they let me pet them. I’d try to market this skill but I lack a guitar case or crazy facial hair. But wait, there’s more! I am of course a fan of writing and a voracious reader, I try my best to finish a book a week but due to the concerns of being an adult and all that nonsense its usually about one every two weeks.
I am easily amused, by myself and the world. It keeps me from going crazy most of the time. As you can probably guess, the sum of these things makes me fairly nerdy which I don’t really try to hide. I’ve also got a healthy interest in all things space related, but my position is just one of a fan. I lack any useful knowledge in the area, I just really want to see us get to other planets. I’d like to see some space colonies before I die. I’m a pretty even-tempered guy, though like everyone I have my moments. If you’re familiar with Meyers-Briggs or True Colors I am an INTJ and a Green. I also have a great fondness for Psychology, and am perusing a degree in the field. Just taking a break at the moment on account of meeting the love of my life and having a child.
I hope that information about myself helps in understanding my posts both past and future. It shouldn’t be as surprising now if I go off on wild tangent about one of these things. I hesitated a little before I wrote this post, I’m usually a pretty private person. But I think this is one of those things where I need the freedom that comes from not hiding things. So if any of this leaves anyone with more questions about the collection of neural impulses that is me, feel free to ask. I’m sure its therapeutic anyway.