That night has long since fled, chased away by star and time.
Now I find myself dreamless and wordless, lost and mute.
I am a stowaway in my body, my mind a shiftless transient.
Still I am drawn on to journey’s end, to the next beginning.
by Nicholas Byrley
Maybe I’ll figure it out some day.
Been working my usual hours but now starting a week of vacation from my primary job, just going to be working my part time jobs this week. Gonna spend the days with my family as well as leisurely periods of writing, gaming, and bowling. Just started my bowling league again so I have to get back in good form. Hope you all have a good week.
My brief intermission turned into an extended absence. Turns out managing work, family, and more work is harder than it looks. It’s almost three months since I posted last. I sadly have little to show for it, mostly just scribbles in my notebooks. Still, there are some poems I can tidy up and post, maybe a little flash fiction. But not too much overall. Been working a lot obviously, actually working three jobs at the moment. I figured two wasn’t too bad, so why not three. It’ll also get me to where I want to go faster, so that’s a bonus. Six days a week, 85 hours on average, and one day off to keep my sanity. I kinda want to see how far I can go.
Its kind of like juggling, only with hours instead of balls. Just a matter of keeping them all going up and around properly. Some hours to sleep, a couple to eat, lots to work, and a few here and there to unwind and spend with family. Writing has been losing out to time with the wife and gaming. The release of Rome 2: Total War hasn’t helped that ratio. Though now that its out and I had my fix, I figured I should make an update. Maybe post a few things.
In the meanwhile, I’ll go on living the dream. Its a little exhausting, a little thrilling. Just to keep it all up. Really not as hard as I thought it would be. And I figure if I can do this now, then later when I quit the extra jobs I have no reason not to dedicate time to writing. Definitely learning how to better manage my time and energy. Not sure if anyone still reads my posts, but feel free to comment if you do. Its always appreciated.
I mourn myself, the man that never was.
Wasted breath and empty thoughts, potential always. squandered.
All my attempts have come up wanting, dreams passed to dust.
I am the fading echo, the aftershock of possibility.
For me purpose has fled, lost to an illspent past and uncaring world.
by Nicholas Byrley
Another evening with my phone, another poetic musing. I don’t think regret is all bad. Within it there is a catalyst for change, you just can’t let it consume you.
Cold Every decision weighed, emotions controlled.
Empathy’s warmth denied, self interests served.
Each move part of a strategy, people only puzzles.
Unfeeling and uncaring, logics firm rule.
by Nicholas Byrley –
Written on my lunch break at my second job, from my phone again. Sometimes I feel this way, and I have to double check and make sure I’m not a robot. Anyone else like this?
Off work today(at least from my day job) and tomorrow to take care of my sick daughter. Variant of RSV and Conjunctivitis in both eyes. Poor thing. Feel free to comment, this one kind of took an odd path.